The Aftermath

Being cheated on might be the worst feeling ever when you have been completely faithful to someone you have loved dearly.Everyone has their own definition of cheating. It can be physical, mental or emotional. It can vary from flirting , personally texting or calling or engaging in specific contact with others. Sometimes in a relationship, partners do not make it clear from the start what the rules .  dbbe5510-a4ca-0132-44f9-0ebc4eccb42f.gifOne partner may see that texting someone else is not a problem while their significant other thinks it is.

As young women, we tend to hurt after being cheated on. We feel as though our world is ending and we will never get through the pain.We never fully take the time to properly heal or to ask others to help us through the process. We sometimes tend to be fearful of what others will say about us. It is very important to heal properly or have an understanding of healing. 5c6ada22749868aa7a655f773ff43d2d.jpgWe tend to walk away or to stay in the relationship with a mindset that we are not good enough.

Everyone has their own method of healing. You may go through a period of depression or you might bounce right back into the game and dust your shoulders off. tumblr_m3zr36mPKN1qdz3y6o1_500.gifSome may accept it and stay. Some feel their female intuition and call their parter out. Some people like to ask their partner certain question on why cheated and get apology for them to heal  while some people do not want closure or an apology because the closure may not make a difference to them. This does not only apply to being cheated on this can also apply for break ups. Do not ever compare your process to someone else’s because we all handle things differently.

The Healing (s) to the Process : 

” First time I got cheated on I separated myself from the guy. After a year of no contact, I was perfectly fine. The second time around, my healing process was different. I stood. I denied. I was angry, sad and hurt. giphy.gifI would comprised myself and worth.I cried a lot.I talked to other people to try to help me move on. NOTHING. I felt like it was myfault because I wasn’t doing enough. I still went back. There was something in me that finally said ‘ WAKE UP’  and forgive but not to forget and to focus on myself. I would definitely say that the healing process helped me grow. It helped me grow in the aspect to not allow anyone to play me and most importantly to have self love”.

“I had a best friend who I would vent to and fortunately he never got tired of me . I also cried A LOT bc I knew that nothing else would help me release my anger and sadness”.

“I cry a lot & I try to talk about things with my best friend so it’s not bottled up in me. tumblr_my841duT5v1sgaqpmo1_500.gif I feel like after I was treated a certain way, I never wanted to feel that low again. Everyone is put in your life for a reason, so I feel as though it helps you grow as a person and understand what you want and you don’t want”.

 

“I feel like time heals wounds . That’s the only way to get over get cheated on”.

“I haven’t been cheated on well at least not that I know of. However, I’ve been in a situation where I thought me & this boy was going to finally be official (two years of talkin) but I found out (not by him) he was in a relationship with a girl that was younger than me. I say that to say the fact that this was the situation AND she was younger than me made me question “why not me, what she have I don’t” and other stupid stuff. I was hurt to the core – giphy.gifI developed insecurities that I didn’t even have before & even tho I’m still recovering for the emotional damage I’m proud to say I’m starting to love myself more. I was able to move on & love myself more by talking to someone like my mom, who I know is wise, being around positive energy so I won’t start thinkin, talking to myself in the mirror saying “I am enough” & just finally accepting nothing was wrong with me – he just wasn’t ready to give me the love I was giving him. It’s a process but worth it when u truly know u deserve better”.

“The first time I was definitely devastated because I really cared about him but it also screwed me up for a while because then I was having a hard time differentiating between good and bad attention; thankfully with family by my side I snapped out of that and just realized I don’t have to let someone determine my worth; I don’t get to give them that power over me even if they are my significant other; it helped me realize how important it was to love myself first; which is a lesson in it all so I think it’s one of those things that I needed .Nothing therapy and God couldn’t fix lol”.

When that healing process is over & you have figure everything out you just begin to Feel Yourself.

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Blessings do not come from ugliness.

Go Check out our blog post on what Cheating means to BBF members , ” I find it Funny that…“.

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5 thoughts on “The Aftermath

  1. Eri Hunt says:

    Wonderful post!! That’s true loving yourself first .It’s the best thing you could ever do. To feel comfortable and happy within. Loving someone being consumed by their every move . Loving with your full heart .Then the person does something completely devastating. But if you focus on yourself and God you will always have a clear mind. Thanks for sharing!

    Like

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